The Fail Monster: I Can’t Shake It

Failure is not sexy:  no matter how you spin it.

I’m creating a Daxko Leadership Academy class for all our Team Leads/ VPs here in Bham.  So I’ve been emerged in a world of change articles, thought leadership, channeling my inner Seth Godin (which is still a joy).  More to come on him this week…

The topic of failure comes up a lot in the” new-world” change model.  More importantly accepting failure as a norm.  Really it’s not about the failure it’s about the rebound.  Guess what— I suck at this. Actually, I need a word more melancholy cause failure rocks me to my core.

I’m hard on myself:  in retrospect I have had many failures, transitions and successful rebounds:

  • a rebound from acting “career”–I use that term loosely
  • a rebound from singing “tryst” — I again use that term loosely
  • a career transition from retail to corp HR
  • a decades long transition from HR admin to HR VP.  There were so many failures, rebounds and rebirths during this period I can’t list them all.
  • a marriage to a divorce to a remarriage
  • a transition from Mississippi to Memphis to Chicago to LA to Birmingham
  • going from skinny to “not-skinny” to “sorda skinnyish”
  • etc

I’ve learned many lessons from these “failures” which have evolved to successes. But the failures have taken me on a ride and, well…. made me the HR insomniac.

So what’s an HR pro to do (other than get a prescription to Ambien):

  • Do look at failure as the new norm in business.  Like in life it is evolutionary.
  • After you’ve ‘failed’ you do look at things like you have “nothing to lose”.  That feels damn good.
  • Network with other HR folks going through the same things.  It’s hard to open up at work in our roles but more HR pros have these failure evolutions than don’t. Cept maybe Kris Dunn…I mean some people are wired to not pay it mind.
  •  It’s OK to hate failure.  I mean whoever tried to make failure sexy is a buffoon. 
  • It’s not OK to treat your failure like an ex-boyfriend you make drunk calls too.  Let. it.go. really. It gets you nowhere.

So even though failure is not sexy (you get that ugly cry face and wipe your nose on your sleeve while you wear your comfy pants), afterwards you can put your fav gloss, a new black dress and start your next evolution.

9 thoughts on “The Fail Monster: I Can’t Shake It

  1. WORD. I thought I loved you, now I KNOW it. Dawn is my New Favorite Person.

  2. Very great post! We’ve all been there and can relate and somehow have managed to survive and be the better for it!

    • @susan! I think the cool thing about these sort of admissions is that EVERYONE has been there. everyone —-

    • It keeps getting worse! Texas retinwirg history, changing school text books to teach conservative values. It is horrible to watch your country implode! The latest in this end is the Texas textbook massacre! It is a terrible thing to watch your your country, your homeland, your place of birth implode. I so wanted to pass this great nation on to my Grandchildren in the condition it was when I was lucky enough to be born here. It is terrible to think of our Grandchildren’s future in this mess we have made of our beautiful united America and our world. Remember America the Beautiful? United we stand divided we fall? I am afraid not enough do and we are in serious trouble! What a shameful legacy we have built and are leaving. We have nothing to be proud of and I am sick with what we have done to what we were left.

  3. Ditto – many times failure can be the key to learning what it takes to be successful! So dont be ashamed, embrace it (so to speak) and wear the scars as simply bumps in the road.

    Awesome thoughts girl!
    Shannon

  4. Good stuff…thanks for sharing your thoughts and well…failures. In the immortal words of Churchill, “never, never, never give up!”

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