“I gotta go through the fire and brace the flame, let it burn real deep to get over the pain, I gotta break through. I gotta break through.” —My girl, Mary J. Blige!
So, I did a speaking gig for #DisruptHR Chicago a few weeks ago. A new speaking format where you get 5 minutes, the slides are on auto pilot and you just go. No notes. Just go. And it was uncomfortable. Which turned out to be a fabulous thing.
Getting out of your comfort zone is the same feeling as riding a roller coaster. See, I’m scared of heights but I love me a roller coaster. Although parts of it are unimaginable (am I really on a flying-train-car-mobile, without some sort containment?), I still feel supported. And for all-intents-and purposes, am pretty sure I’m gonna make it through the ride (aka won’t die).
When the ride is over your adrenaline starts to drop, you exhale and start laughing really hard. You made it. And then you want to do it again.
This was the same Same with #DisruptHR Chicago. I’m pretty good at public speaking, but this format was simply new. When I stepped on stage in front of 250 folks doing this presentation for the first time, I wasn’t sure what the outcome would be.
When it was over and I didn’t die, and folks seemed to like it — I exhaled, laughed really hard and wanted to do it again.
So here are some of my thoughts on how to disrupt your comfort zone once you’ve ID’d your new challenge:
- ID what transferable skills you have that will help in this new arena. In this case I referred back to my theatre days. This new format was the same as learning a 5 minute soliloquy. No sweat.
- Ask for an opportunity to take on the challenge. In this case I reached out and asked some Disrupt HR folks, namely Jennifer McClure and Charlie Judy to be considered for this gig. Going for the ask may have been the hardest part of the whole process. It’s easy to cover up fear of disrupting your comfort zone by “waiting” for someone to give you an op.
- Get support. Tell people what you are doing and what you need help with. I asked my Daxko team to watch me practice my presentation. This was invaluable. My buddy Kris Dunn shared some tips with me. A group I’m a part of called Boondoggle (Jason Lauritsen, Joe Gerstandt, Stuart Chittenden, Maddie Grant, Jamie Notter) were full of hugs and love that night (I’m big on this).
- Find others in the same boat as you, struggling with the same challenge, and have counseling sessions. You are never the only one working on a challenge.
- Remember this is still your jam: Some folks you count on will disappoint. Some folks will simply be too busy or distracted to pay you attention. Some folks will think you really don’t need the help. You do need to remember at the end of the day, this is your adventure to drive.
- Get quiet/ Find zen. Before any new challenge you need quiet time to think. Absorb. Be creative. Focus. Before the DisruptHR Chicago event the energy was so high in the room I had to find a quiet corner at the other end of the building to just be quiet. And yes, some of this time was in a bathroom stall just sitting. It was the only quiet place! This is essential.
- Do a post-mortem. I was fortunate to get a video of my performance. Although I feel I did well, I learned so much by just watching. Believe you me, I’m gonna change much of my delivery. This is the second hardest part to the process — reviewing the results warts-and-all.
THEN, last but not least:
- Eat Ice Cream
- Get a Massage
- Hug your cat-spouse-kid
Enjoy knowing you just grew a little.